It Goes On
In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on. -- Robert Frost
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I’ve been on this journey for quite a while. It’s taken me a while to get comfortable with myself. The acceptance of being me has been quite hard. It’s a process and a struggle I face every single day. Thinking back at it all. I should have been comfortable with myself. Embraced who I was and ignored what other people had said to me. Everyday is a new struggle to face my fears. I’ve met some incredible people on this ride who have helped me get through this journey I call life. I recently met someone who changed everything in my life. It was a total 180. This guy had the ability to bring the brightest smile on my face. And even if I was upset with him at the end of the day I loved him more than he could ever know. Doesn’t matter what happens in my life; I’ll thank him for doing one thing. Letting me be comfortable with me and embracing what and who I am.  I had never held hands, kissed, or showed any display of affection publicly. He taught me to ignore the haters and just be me.  When I’m with him all my imperfections all my worries just go away. When I kiss him. Its like fireworks, its like a spark of energy is ignited within me. I don’t take any moment we spend for granted. If I could I would tell him how much I love him every second of everyday.  I realize I make a million mistakes, I say things that could hurt his feelings, but I’ve never been so honest and so upfront with my feeling ever with anyone. It just feels safe and I’m able to tell him exactly how I feel. I get that I’m not the coolest not the prettiest person out there; and who gives a fuck about that. It’s about being you and doing you right. At the end of the day you have to please yourself and make sure that you’re happy because if you spend time making sure everyone around is you happy then you’ll never be happy yourself.  I just want to let him know how much I care for him and how much he means to me. This boy means the world to me. I could never hurt him and I want him to be the happiest person alive. I know he has been treated wrong before and I feel like that’s the worst feeling ever. His joy and happiness is what makes me want to be a better person. His stubbornness is what helps me become more driven to get everything out of him. I want to show him that I can give him everything. I want to show him that I can be take charge. I know that I will not always meet his expectations but knowing that I can potentially meet them is what gives me hope. I love this kid. And he makes me so happy his kisses his kind words are like a high to me. It feels amazing. 

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